I occasionally like a bad film. No, I am not talking about boring films but films that are so unbelievably bad that they are infamous. Because of this, I've seen every film from Harry Medved's great book "The 50 Worst Films of All Time" as well as most of the ever- changing IMDb Bottom 100 list. I think much of it is because many of these films are unintentionally funny. Plus, with my love for foreign and silent films, I sometimes long for something mindlessly different...and at least "The Garbage Pail Kids Movie" is mindless!

Before I get to the film, I should probably mention exactly what the Garbage Pail Kids were. In the 1980s, Topps came up with a new sort of collectible card...the Garbage Pail Kids. They were rude, disgusting and exactly what kids loved! In other words, the more adults hated them and thought they were awful, the more kids wanted them and they were, briefly, popular. So, some idiot at some studio actually came up with the bright idea to turn these repulsive characters into movie stars! And, in the process, they pretty much destroyed the popularity of the cards! Here's why:

When the film starts, some incredibly white bread-looking 'thugs' push around some dopey kid. To his aid come the Garbage Pail Kids...things that live in a garbage can in Captain Manzini's shop. The guy, surprisingly, is played by a real actor, Anthony Newley and it's sad that it's his final film. The Kids are very disgusting...wetting themselves, eating fingers and eyes, are covered with huge zits, snot and the like. Despite their looks (which we'll talk more about soon),they are helpful and enable the dopey kid, 'Dodger', to successfully overcome some unrealistic situations and problems.

The biggest problem with the film are the technical problems in making the Kids look like the stickers. The stickers were grotesque and the movie TRIED to make the characters look just like the stickers...but the technology of the 1980s just wasn't up to the task. The characters are not only gross (as they should have been) but creepy and hellish--like something out of a nightmare. This is heightened by the lifeless quality of the costumes--with faces that barely move when they talk and this alone makes the vomit, urine and snot look downright nice by comparison! Nowadays, they could use CGI or better traditional special effects to make better characters...though why would they want to bother? I say this because although the characters are hellish, the plot of the film is incredibly dull and would have bored all the kids who saw it...but fortunately, few did.

So overall, you have annoying characters that look almost demonic involved in a plot that bores the life out of the audience...so much that the offensive elements seem almost like a welcome relief! Awful, misguided and stupid...with nothing that even approaches entertainment for even the most easy to please viewer. It's infamous reputation is well deserved and the word 'garbage' in the title is quite appropriate.

A garbage can spaceship approaches Earth and somehow ends up in Captain Manzini's antique shop. Dodger is a teen boy who works for Manzini and gets bullied by punks. He likes Tangerine, the girlfriend of the leader Juice of the group. She's in the shop when Juice and the guys walk in. They decide to beat him up and end up knocking over the garbage pail. The Kids are released.

The Garbage Pail Kids is a successful series of cards by Topps from the 80's to parody the popular Cabbage Patch Kids. The Kids are so ugly. They are unbelievably disturbingly ugly. Apart from the ugly Kids, Dodger has an awkward lust for the older Tangerine. The suggested sexuality is cringeworthy. On top of that, the fashion is ridiculous and the punks are silly. The acting is generally poor. There is little narrative drive. Somehow, I didn't realize that the Kids sing. It's all pretty bad without much fun.

this is it! officially the worst movie I've ever watched. and im not just saying it out of the moment. absolutely the worst. the fact that i didn't stop watching it after 10 minutes means i have a strong sense of resistance. besides the fact that the kids themselves make chucky from "child's play" look like a care bear and they're disgusting as hell, this movie contains the two stupidest plots ever integrated into a film. the first: the state home of the ugly. not making this up. i don't even think Hitler's eugenics program would have come up with such a thing. second: the bullies harrasing the main character, dodger, use him and the kids to (again, not making it up) run a scheme to make what the 80's considers "fashionable" clothes and sell them. for one, while the colombians were shipping tons upon tons of blow over here, these "thugs" were getting rich off of these. lame. and come on, even by 80's standards, these clothes were ridiculously wretched. then again, it WAS the 80's. oh well (shrug). that, and actually having the garbage pail kids actually have skills. lol. if you are gonna watch this and if you're of legal age, i highly recommend having some booze around. just saying.