TAKE ME HIGH is an amazingly awful '70s musical starring none other than boy wonder Cliff Richard as a banker sent to close down a struggling restaurant in Birmingham, of all places. While there he romances a waitress - played by former DR WHO assistant Deborah Watling - and decides to set up his own burger bar. Yes, it plays out as a kind of silly spoof but without anything in the way of proper comedy, while the songs - including various odes to fast food - are remarkably awful. The only reason anyone would want to tune in is for the '70s trappings, which dominate the proceedings, and the glimpses of familiar faces: Richard Wattis as the harried boss, Madeline Smith against type as the frumpy, shrewish wife, and a youthful Anthony Andrews as a lothario.

This is a shocker. No other word for it. Cliff has certainly grown up since his adolescent efforts of the late 1960s, but what they had by way of innocent charm and boppy numbers then has been replaced here by a ridiculous plot, some serious hamming from Hugh Griffiths, conceivably the worst song I've ever heard in a film - "Brumburger" (the story being set in Birmingham) and a banal dialogue that would test the patience of Mother Theresa. The poster claims there are twelve new songs, but they have neither the weight nor the catchiness to sustain this over-long story that shows the city at it's most architecturally brutal. The assembled cast including a debut appearance from Anthony Andrews and some mischief from veteran George Cole just make it worse. The story is all over the place, and the direction seems uncertain as to whether this is a piece of entertainment or a series of video-guides of the city's rather grim urban landscape - either way it really is quite a struggle. Sorry, but even his most ardent fans must appreciate that this is a poor film on just about every front.

The only bearable way to watch this film is to fast forward through all of the songs.So then you can watch George Cole before Minder,Hugh Griffith's overacting like mad and Richard Wattis making the most of his cameo and Anthony Andrews in his first film,before his role in Young Churchill.The brutalist architecture of Birmingham is unspeakably bad,like the film.