The movie begins as Miá and Fábio are waiting in line to get married by a justice of the peace, having known each other for almost no time at all. From there they go straight to their honeymoon, which will take place aboard a cruise liner with an ultimate stop in Italy. The couple have several issues which develop from their quick marriage - namely they don't really know each other very well.

Fábio is a cheapskate who won't do or buy anything on the ship that isn't included in the package (nor will he let Miá) and seems to think it's perfectly acceptable to only wear soccer jerseys to any event. Miá serves mainly as a pretty face to look at and doesn't really bring anything of value to the film, other than to put up with Fábio's BS and advance the plot.

Soon the couple runs into another couple, and it turns out Miá used to date the man, and Fábio had a crush on the woman since childhood. Of course neither are open and honest, so this leads to problems including the man trying to seduce Miá. Two crew members are also introduced, who have a bet about whether or not Miá and Fábio will split up before the cruise is over and both begin meddling in the relationship. Complicating matters further is Fábio's annoying and immature friend Cabeça, who for some reason was invited by Fábio to stay in their cabin to cruise to Italy (without discussing this with Miá beforehand). From there the couple has to try to mend differences and overcome all of the challenges that they've brought upon themselves.

Overall the movie wasn't too bad, but it's full of clichés and if-only-they-just-told-each-other-the-truth moments. It has several very funny scenes, but you'll probably walk away feeling like you've seen this movie before.

Well, this is a movie starring a bunch of Brazilian TV comedians, and also some "soap opera" actors. The lead actor is a stand up comedian, who's pretty silly and got famous in Brazil for a while, but all he does is to talk out loud and make goofy faces. Trust me, you would't want to spend your time on this crap.

The immature and cheap douche bag Fábio Clóvis (Fábio Porchat) marries the pseudo-intellectual Miá (Miá Mello) and they travel in a cruise to Europe on board of a fancy passenger vessel. Fabio and Miá are invited to have dinner with the wealthy Beto Assunção (Alejandro Claveaux) and his gorgeous wife Laura (Juliana Didone) in a VIP restaurant on the vessel. Soon Fábio discovers that Beto was Miá's boyfriend and Miá learns that Fábio had a crush on Laura that was his classmate. Meanwhile the cynical chamber maid Suzana Mello (Inez Viana) and her estranged husband, the entertainer Wilson (Marcelo Valle) make a bet that Fábio and Miá will split before the end of the trip and poison their relationship. When the ship arrives in Casablanca, Fábio meets his bothersome childhood friend Cabeça (Rafael Queiroga) that affects their honeymoon.

"Meu Passado Me Condena" is a feature based on a popular Brazilian television series with the comedians Fábio Porchat and Miá Mello. The plot is silly, but also funny for the Brazilian audiences. However I am not sure whether most of the jokes that are based on the Brazilian stereotypes and culture would work for overseas audiences. My vote is six.

Title (Brazil): "Meu Passado Me Condena: O Filme" ("My Past Condemns me: The Movie")