G.I. JOE: RISE OF THE COBRA was a brain-dead Hollywood reworking of the Hasbro toy line in which a group of mentally-challenged thugs (I mean heroes) led by Channing Tatum waged war on various international villains in order to prevent worldly disaster. This sequel offers up more of the same, although thankfully Tatum doesn't appear much on screen and has been supplanted by the better Bruce Willis for much of the running time.
I'd have a hard time describing the events of this film, other than to say that the squad are out on a mission of revenge after a number of their own are killed in a surprise attack. The baddies have plans for world dominance thanks to some super technology, and much of it boils down to the exceptionally creepy Jonathan Pryce masquerading as the US President (except he's really Arnold Vosloo...watch the film and you'll see).
The plot is complete nonsense of course, and merely an excuse for one big budgeted, zero imagination action sequence after another. This effects-heavy movie tries to be a thrill-ride along the lines of RED or the FAST AND THE FURIOUS franchise but it just feels uninteresting for the most part. There are only so many scenes you can watch of random ninjas fighting and stuff blowing up. It's hardly a workout for the cast, either; Willis and Dwayne Johnson are on autopilot, Lee Byung-Hun has little to work with, Ray Stevenson is a stock villain, and the less said about RZA the better.
G.I. Joe: Retaliation
2013
Action / Adventure / Sci-Fi / Thriller
G.I. Joe: Retaliation
2013
Action / Adventure / Sci-Fi / Thriller
Keywords: secretconspiracyassassinrescueexplosion
Plot summary
The Joes re-team to prevent Cobra from achieving total world domination in this sequel that picks up shortly after the events of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra. The Nanomite threat has been neutralized, and the U.S. government has imprisoned Cobra Commander and Destro in an inescapable subterranean prison. When the leader of Pakistan is assassinated, the U.S. president (Jonathan Pryce) calls on the Joes to secure Pakistan's nuclear warheads before they fall into enemy hands. In the wake of successfully completing their mission, however, the Joes are decimated in a devastating surprise attack. When the smoke clears, Roadblock (Dwayne Johnson),Lady Jaye (Adrianne Palicki),and Flint (D.J. Cotrona) are the sole survivors. They're convinced that something is amiss in the White House, and as Lady Jaye theorizes that an impostor is pretending to be the commander in chief, bad guys Storm Shadow (Lee Byung-Hun) and Firefly (Ray Stevenson) team up to break Cobra Commander (Luke Bracey) out of prison. Later, as Storm Shadow retreats into the mountains to recover from burns incurred in the extraction, Snake Eyes (Ray Park) and Jinx (Elodie Yung) manage to capture the elusive white ninja, in the process discovering a shocking secret about his past and learning that Zartan (Arnold Vosloo),posing as the president, has called an international summit to discuss nuclear disarmament in order to bring the leaders of the world to their knees before the diabolical Cobra Commander. Now, as Cobra holds the entire globe hostage with a revolutionary new weapon placed on satellites orbiting the planet, it's up to the Joes and a trustworthy old friend to save the day..
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Silliest Hollywood blockbuster ever?
They get blown up.
Duke (Channing Tatum) is the new leader of the G.I. Joe unit. The unit is attacked and only Roadblock (Dwayne Johnson),Flint (D.J. Cotrona),and Lady Jaye (Adrianne Palicki) survive. The Joes are replaced by Cobra.
Tatum has some fun chemistry with The Rock but right away, he gets killed off. After that, it's a lot of shooting, a lot of muscles with big guns. The Rock is solid but a lot of times, it feels like he's alone in the movie. Adrianne Palicki is tall, skinny, and a little stiff. D.J. Cotrona is little more than a mannequin. Bruce Willis has a smaller role and he seemed to be completely lost. As for the action, it's good that a lot of it is real things blowing up. I always appreciate the effort. I can't recommend paying to watch this.
Not much to Joe
So the first GI Joe did well at the box office but the critics disliked it.
The lead actor had all the charisma of a wooden fence and could be pipped for a best acting award by a dead sheep.
Who do you call? The Franchise re-generator, otherwise known as The Rock also called Dwayne Johnson.
Channing Tatum returns in this film, mainly because he has shown a spark of talent since the first movie.
However the film is then led by Johnson and his team who has to deal with the doppelganger of the President of the USA that we saw in the first film.
Strangely we see little of the main villains from the original movie. Maybe the actors did not want to return but Christopher Eccleston and Joseph Gordon-Levitt are absent although Joseph has been replaced by another actor as Cobra Commander.
Bruce Willis has been added to the action although he is there for no particular purpose but to add some star status. Snake Eyes seems to get the best action scenes but I suspect this franchise is in trouble.