Steven Seagal plays a Colonel called Robert Sikes who's wife and son were killed in some sort of accident involving criminal activity.

Now, being the ever faithful husband and loving father, he spends the rest of his days mooching around unnamed cities killing absolutely anyone who commits a crime, much like Max Von Sydow in Judge Dredd.

Drop a cigarette butt, he will find you, and he will kill you, because he's got a particular set of skills...

He's not that extreme, but if your dealing drugs on the street, or meeting up in a car park at night, make sure you look up first, because there may be a bearded obese man with his sights on you.

Enter Craig Sheffer, looking disturbingly like he's actually wearing a Craig Sheffer mask, playing an FBI agent assigned to capture him. Trouble is, Seagal is just too fast and too good for him, so they only ever bump into each other in the one nightclub in the whole world, and it just happens to be run by bad guys, so he blows it up anyway.

But it's all not what it seems, Axel Foley's mate who got killed in Beverly Hills Cop is the main bad guy, and him, Sheffer, and the cops are all after Seagal.

Just look for the gigantic shadow.....

It's a step up from the debacle that was Sniper: Special Ops, but that's saying that breaking your leg is better than breaking your neck.

We all know, us the long suffering fans of Seagal, that he will never reach the giddy heights of Marked For Justice, Hard to Siege, Above Deadly ground, or even Out For Death, and we all know that he is phoning in his performance now, just like he's been doing for the last ten or so years.

And he knows this, that's why he's churning out as many films he can, because he's getting old, and becoming more ridiculous looking with every film.

Here, he doesn't utter a syllable units the 48 minute mark, when he bumps into Sheffer, and this is the best part, because he some random body movement to make it look like he's moving fast.

It's not a good film, the final fight is like watching two fat man swat a fly first, and when we get to see them actually doing some decent fighting, it's just two visibly skinnier men in the shadows.

And then it all finishes without any real closure.

But it's worth seeing for Seagal wearing his outfit ready for his next film, and to see just how hilarious Sheffer looks now. He actually looks like a creature from Nightbreed.

Not good.

CODE OF HONOR is the very latest in a series of star action vehicles for bloated and charisma-free Steven Seagal, the former great who has been making bad film after bad film for just under twenty years now. Bizarrely, this one's not been shot in Eastern Europe but Utah for a change, although ironically it's even worse than Seagal's previous Romanian and Bulgarian adventures.

The story sees Seagal as a high-tech vigilante who goes around taking down drug dealers and criminals with his sniper rifle. The police are on the case and so are various bad guys who want to take revenge for the slayings. What quickly becomes apparent is that Seagal is nothing more than a supporting player in his own movie. He gets little screen time and just one or two fight scenes which are laughably poor.

The film has plenty of cheesy CGI blood which looks even more ridiculous than that we saw in THE EXPENDABLES. Despite the violence it's a real bore to sit through with barely any plot, a distinct lack of characterisation, and irrelevant sub-plots. Craig Sheffer and James Russo are two of the tired looking actors who show up to pick up their pay and keep their heads down. The ridiculous climax is particularly poorly handled and leaves the viewer thinking "is that it?".

They do not need to worry. Not only because Steven Seagals character won't be after them (he's hunting criminals you see?),but also because this just tries to mash a couple of things and take a decent idea and make something out of it. I'd say it doesn't succeed, but at least it doesn't shy away from showing the violence behind it all (even if most of the blood, if not all is CGI).

Youz also get some nudity (a friend of mine told me that Steven Seagal movies nowadays have at least one scene shot in a strip club, haven't checked if that's accurate but wouldn't be surprised at all) if that floats your boat. And a story of sorts of someone being after a guy, although they have the same goal and ... well who am I kidding, you're not going to watch this because of a plot. Even when it sounds decent and made me reconsider my own recent ban on Seagal movies and watch this. He did worse, but if you're not a fan, you probably should just stay away ...