This entertainingly tacky'n'trashy distaff "Death Wish" copy stars the exceptionally gorgeous and well-endowed brunette hottie supreme Karin Mani as Billie Clark, a top-notch martial arts fighter and one woman wrecking crew who opens up a gigantic ten gallon drum of ferocious chopsocky whup-a** on assorted no-count scuzzy muggers, rapists, drug dealers and street gang members after some nasty low-life criminals attack her beloved grand parents. The stunningly voluptuous Ms. Mani sinks her teeth into her feisty butt-stomping tough chick part with winningly spunky aplomb, beating jerky guys up with infectious glee and baring her smoking hot bod in a few utterly gratuitous, but much-appreciated nude scenes. Unfortunately, Mani possesses an extremely irritating chewing-on-marbles harsh and grating voice that's sheer murder on the ears (my favorite moment concerning Mani's dubious delivery of her dialogue occurs when she quips "Don't mess with girls in the park; that's not nice!" after clobbering a few detestable hooligans. The delectable Karin's sole subsequent film role was in "Avenging Angel," in which she does a truly eye-popping full-frontal nude scene, but doesn't have any lines.) The film's single most sensationally sleazy sequence transpires when Mani gets briefly incarcerated on a contempt of court charge and shows her considerably substantial stuff in a group prison shower scene. Of course, Mani's lascivious lesbian cell mate tries to seduce her only to have her unwanted advances rebuffed with a severe beatdown! Strangely enough, the lesbian forgives Mani and becomes her best buddy while she's behind bars. Given an extra galvanizing shot in the vigorously rough'n'ready arm by Edward Victor's punchy direction, a funky-rockin' score, endearingly crummy acting by a game (if lame) cast, a constant snappy pace, numerous pull-out-all-the-stops exciting fight scenes, and Howard Anderson III's gritty photography, this immensely enjoyable down'n'dirty exploitation swill is essential viewing for hardcore fans of blithely low-grade low-budget grindhouse cinema junk.
Plot summary
Somewhere in the seedy side of 1980s Los Angeles, Billie, a feisty black-belt karate expert, finds herself in the crosshairs of the local gangster, Scarface. After the brutal assault of her grandparents, Billie embarks on a mission to rid the neighbourhood of Scarface and his thugs, eager to serve a hearty slice of good, old-fashioned vigilante justice. Now, there is no turning back, and as Billie catches the attention of corrupt police officers and the sluggish penal system, she decides to take matters into her own hands. Who dares to get in the way of the dangerous alley cat?
Uploaded by: FREEMAN
Director
Top cast
Tech specs
720p.BLU 1080p.BLUMovie Reviews
"Don't mess with girls in the park; that's not nice!" An enjoyably sleazy distaff "Death Wish" clone
Gender reversal Death Wish
ALLEY CAT is a low budget American thriller clearly devised as a gender reversal twist on the DEATH WISH franchise. The heroine is a young woman blessed with martial arts skills who finds herself tangling with a gang of rapists and murderers when her grandparents are accidentally bumped off by the villains. She then cuts a swathe through the lower elements of the local nightlife.
It's simplistic stuff indeed but not without a simple verve to see it through. Various sub-plots have been added in in order to increase the running time, including a dull romance between the heroine and some Jewish guy and a brief sojourn in prison which manages to include the usual prison clichés despite not occupying much screen time.
It's quite artificial stuff but not without merit. Sadly the action sequences are poorly shot and conceived; if they'd been decent then this might have been an acceptable little thriller, but as it stands they're quite boring. The cast is full of those types of actor that you've never heard of before or after and most of the film takes place at night which means a lot of night scenes where you can't really make out what's going on.
Ninja In A Tank Top
Karin Mani's tires get pulled off her car, but she beats up the thieves. Her grandparents are mugged and killed by the same hoods. Fortunately for her, she's a ninja in a tank top and Capri pants, so they don't stand a chance in this awful little movie.
There's a lot that wrong, from the idiotic lines to the robotic acting, so let's talk about the foley work, with every background noise way too loud. Fortunately it covers up the dalogue.
The camerawork doesn't stink.